


Meet me in the morning sun

by INeverHadMyInternetPhase



Series: QPR Verse [4]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Aromantic, Asexual Character, Asexuality, Fluff, M/M, QPR verse, Queerplatonic Relationships, undertones of all these anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 13:30:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11738052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/INeverHadMyInternetPhase/pseuds/INeverHadMyInternetPhase
Summary: Dan's moving to Manchester





	Meet me in the morning sun

**Author's Note:**

> Who actually works on their ongoing projects anymore? Writing random self-inserty oneshots to indulge your own needs is so much more fun xD
> 
> (I'm sorry I'll get back to Big Bang and In My Way eventually)

Dan was coming to his city.

_Dan was coming to his city._

It still didn’t quite feel real. These past few months, they’d hurt because of the distance, because of knowing Dan was real and good and his but far away, distant, difficult to remember when he was out of Phil’s arms.

But today was the day, Dan was arriving, and nothing could feel better than that.

 Phil wandered up and down the living room of his flat, the one that was small but still somehow felt too big when he was in it alone. Dan had stayed here a lot already, despite the fact that Phil had only moved here a month ago. In fact, it was kind of ridiculous that Phil was feeling nervous at all. He’d literally last seen Dan three days ago, when Dan left to scurry home to pack for properly moving here. They’d barely been apart at all.

But it still felt like too long.

Things between them were still being ironed out. Exactly what they were was hard to put a finger on, but Phil knew without a doubt that Dan would be important in his life, and he would have a place in Dan’s, too. They’d talked about it extensively, and talked themselves into circles more often than not. It was easier in person. Skype talks were the hardest.

Skype talks where Dan would grow sad and tired, eyes dim at 3am, talking himself out of things. He talked a lot, talked around his problems, and Phil was happy to sit and listen even if he didn’t feel like he had too much to offer.

“Like, what even are we?” Dan had asked earlier, in the beginning, in the early days after the Halloween gathering when Phil had still been at his parents’ house. “You’re not my boyfriend. You’re a friend, sure, but you’re something else too. I don’t know what to call it.”

“I know,” Phil agreed softly. “I don’t know if there’s a word for it, actually.”

“Well, we can’t be the only ones.” Dan’s brow furrowed a little, his focus shifting. There was the sound of him clicking onto another tab. “Can I ask you something?”

Phil smiled, pulling his laptop closer to his face. “We already established you can ask me anything.”

“Yeah,” Dan answered, monotone. He was doing that thing where he wouldn’t directly meet Phil’s eyes, which Phil had come to learn meant he was probably extra nervous about whatever he was about to say. “Would it... would it bother you if I’d done some research?”

Phil tilted his head, inquisitive. “Research?”

“Just, like,” Dan shifted awkwardly. “On google. Looking up what to call it. Not, like, for us necessarily. I just want to know what the other people on the internet are saying. Like, if it’s… you know, what it is, exactly.”

Phil knew the underlying meaning of his words, now, from his place of privilege several months later. Dan meant he needed to look up whether or not a relationship like theirs was even a real thing, whether or not he was allowed to have it, if other people would look down on them for it. This kind of thing bothered Dan a lot, Phil had learned. Whether or not other people would tear him down for something he wanted.

It came from his past, Phil knew. But he didn’t ask too much. Dan would tell him when he was ready, and they had their whole futures for that.

“Our relationship is whatever we want it to be,” Phil reminded Dan, in various ways, across the next few months. When Dan met him at the train station for the first time after the Halloween gathering and immediately tried to kiss him. Phil had been a little taken aback, but they’d tried it once before, so he sort of went along with it until Dan leaned back with a slightly disgusted look on his face.

“And some people actually enjoy that?” He’d said, the first thing spoken aloud to Phil.

Phil snorted. Which turned into a laugh. Which turned into a round of hiccoughs that didn’t go away for the next couple of hours. Cue Dan poking fun at him for the whole rest of the day.

The last few months, they’d been trying. It would have been easier if Dan was closer, Phil was sure, and even though they’d seen each other a ridiculous amount (aside from the horrible time that Dan was in India with questionable wifi and even more questionable phone signal, but thy didn’t talk about that) there still wasn’t much they could do to really sort things out. Sporadic visits spent wrapped in each other’s’ arms didn’t do much to quell either of their nerves.

Dan about what they were. Phil about what they might become.

He could see it, from the minute Dan accepted his place at Manchester uni – a possible future for them, stretching out, quiet days with Dan studying and Phil working, fun making videos together, doing outside jobs, trips out to the city together that didn’t feel like there was a constant clock hanging over their heads counting down their remaining time together.

Dan didn’t share much of his research with Phil, if he’d done any of it. But he also didn’t try to kiss Phil again. Instead, any time they did spend together was held indoors mostly, wrapped up in Phil’s blue and green duvet, sipping hot drinks in starbucks, staring at each other for probably too long, holding hands whenever possible.

Dan was clingy when they were alone, a little more guarded in public. Out on the streets he’d hold Phil’s hand but make loud jokes about what the people on the internet would think if they could see them together, a touch of discomfort behind his tone that Phil didn’t know how to quiet. He didn’t like it either, the things people assumed. Not many people, certainly not all of them, just the few odd comments that mentioned things like Dan’s dailybooths and Phil’s earlier, flirtatious videos. Things the two of them weren’t comfortable with, but didn’t quite know how to voice.

At least when they were together, those things didn’t matter at all.

Phil was doing his best to remember that now, as he paced around his flat feeling like he couldn’t get out. He couldn’t even go and meet Dan this time, had no real idea where Dan was right now. In a car packed full of stuff somewhere on the M60, probably, with his parents and his grandma who’d insisted on coming. Phil had spoken to her on Skype several times when she’d insisted on joining in Dan’s conversations. She’d called him a nice young man. Dan had glowed when she said it, said, “He is, isn’t he,” all with the fondest look on his face.

It hurt Phil’s heart a little to think of.

Dan, coming closer. But permanently this time. With his parents, and Dan was still iffy about Phil meeting them, his two worlds colliding, so Phil was keeping his respectful distance. Besides, he wanted to jump on Dan and hug him without watching eyes, and he wasn’t honestly sure he could keep his hands off at this point.

After three days. It was ridiculous. Dan had only gone home to pack, had basically been living with Phil for the past month anyway. But Phil had been spoiled by the closeness. It made the distance even more difficult to handle this time.

It was sweetened a little by the knowledge that this time, when he met Dan, he wouldn’t have to say goodbye.

Just then, Phil’s phone buzzed with a text.

**Dan:** _heading into Manchester rn >.< so excited/nervous_

Phil smiled, his grip tightening around his phone. He knew the feeling. He’d paced literal circles into the floor of his living room, nervous for some reason he didn’t even fully understand. He texted back quickly, feeling his pulse pick up at even that tiny bit of interaction. It was ridiculous. Phil didn’t really _do_ feelings like this, never had in the past.

**Phil:** _nervecited. And same <3 let me know when you arrive safe?_

The reply only took seconds to come through

**Dan:** _don’t worry I will literally can’t wait (also can I come over like as soon as parents have left halls look grim)_

Phil’s smile grew as he texted back _of course pls come over asap_. His heart took this as motivation to start thumping away extra-loudly in his chest, though, which Phil thought was a bit much really. Feelings like this just didn’t exist for him. It had always been a cliché, something he read about but didn’t relate to. Until Dan came along.

It was strange. Phil hadn’t been prepared for meeting him at all, when he’d first sent Dan a dm after all the comments and tweets and posts had been going on. He hadn’t been prepared at all for the first picture he saw of Dan, or the first time they skyped, or getting to know him slowly over the days and weeks and months had led them here. He hadn’t know, making those first early videos, that Dan would sit and watch them and love them enough to try and get Phil’s attention. He didn’t know what was waiting for him.

It made him excited for what the future might hold. It also made him exceptionally grateful for everything he’d gained that year.

The months of Dan visiting had been wonderful, getting to see Dan, to hold him, to hug him. Having Dan hug and hold him back. But it had always been with a time limit. Not after today. Phil still didn’t fully know what to make of that, exactly how that would feel.

Were they even ready for this? Did everyone freak out this much over a significant other arriving in the same place? Phil had no frame of reference, never having had someone like this in all his twenty three years of life. And Dan was so much younger. Did either of them really know what they were doing? This was kind of a big step. How on earth were they going to know if they were ready?

Phil was shaken out of his thoughts, however many minutes later, by another text.

**Dan:** _here now. Unpacking. Will let you know when I’m on my way over_

But before he could reply, another one came through, this time from PJ. Phil arched a brow, but then sighed a little at the message.

**PJ:** _today’s the big move day? Be careful xx_

Phil knew PJ still only wanted what was best for him. And PJ had grown much more pleased with the relationship Phil had built with Dan over these past few months, even if he still wasn’t entirely approving. But he’d only met Dan a handful of times. Phil knew Dan inside out and back to front by this point, even if there was still a lot to learn. He knew Dan wasn’t some creepy stalker out to get him for views and money.

(Well, maybe Dan was a bit of a stalker, but a harmless one. A desired one, even).

PJ, however, was just looking out for Phil, and had his reservations over Dan’s true motives. Phil expected they would go away with time, which hopefully he and Dan would have now. Everything would solidify. Wouldn’t it? Or would it disintegrate with proximity?

Somehow, Phil doubted it. Everything within him ached to be near Dan.

He texted back PJ.

**Phil:** _dw I’ve got it covered. Everything is good xx_

And then Dan, with a bit more of a smile.

**Phil:** _can’t come soon enough <3_

Then he went back to pacing his flat.

It was somehow more difficult, knowing Dan was right there, in his city, so close yet still so far away. Phil had never felt more alone and less alone simultaneously. Dan was so close, almost within his reach, so tantalisingly close to never having to say goodbye to Phil again. But he couldn’t have him yet. Not completely.

Besides, Dan was moving into uni halls. The possibility of him not even wanting to hang around Phil that much had cropped up occasionally in Phil’s mind. Besides, shouldn’t Phil want Dan to go to uni? To have a normal uni experience with the other people on his course? And he did want that for Dan. Just, selfishly, Phil wanted to keep him to himself, too.

He didn’t think he had too much to worry about. Dan was nervous about this next step, and Phil was something stable, he’d told Phil before. With Phil, Dan felt safe. He was likely to cling to that even more as uni got scary and hard. Phil would be there, always, and maybe he could help Dan to have his uni experience too.

Regardless, they would be together again. The nerves in Phil’s stomach jumped, but he felt strangely settled too. Soon he’d have Dan back in his arms again, and this time with no clock hanging over their heads.

His phone buzzed again.

**Dan:** _parents just left on my way_

Phil grinned, and just sent a bunch of heart emojis in response. And then went into ninja cleaning mode, because he just realised he didn’t have Dan’s favourite hot chocolate out of the cupboard yet and the kettle was still surrounded by packets of the numerous sweets Phil had consumed earlier.

When the buzzer for his flat went, Phil was over answering it as soon as possible, letting Dan in without even bothering to pick up the receiver. He knew who it would be, and his heart was fluttering in response.

Dan was coming up his stairs, Phil’s stomach curled over itself.

Dan was knocking on his door, Phil’s fingers started shaking.

He pulled open the door, Dan was waiting outside. Brown fringe slightly curling, eyes deep and dark and hopeful, gangly long limbs already slightly taller than Phil, awkward looking and oddly shy.

“Hi,” he said, smiling softly. “You can’t get rid of me this time.”

Phil shook his head, reached out, and pulled Dan into a hug. He breathed him in again, eyes closed, losing himself in the familiarity.

“You’re ridiculous, it’s been three days,” Dan chuckled, trying to sound sarcastic but mostly just sounding happy. And he held Phil back tightly, clinging on more than ever.

Phil lost himself in the feeling, delved in close as he could, buried himself in the knowledge of Dan being close again, and finally relaxed. The months of worrying over when this would happen, when he’d welcome Dan in and not have to say goodbye again, when the city he lived in would be a city they shared.

Phil held on tight, safe in the knowledge that this time he didn’t have to let go.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr, @ineverhadmyinternetphase ^_^


End file.
